Vivid Language: A Deal
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Vivid Language: A Deal
We were told to pick a previously written piece and continue it. There were six/seven choices, and so, I picked one of a man standing alone in the dark, smoking a cigarette. This is the continuation.
A foot caught the spark and put an end to any possibility that it would catch alight again.
“You got the stuff?” A shadow flickered as another man emerged from the darkness.
“Yeah, I got it.” The shadow man revealed a previously absent suitcase was brought from beneath his
coat. An atmosphere of tension was immediately born at the sight of the suitcase. What it contained
would change everything. It would make everything right again. Amidal took a step forward. The
shadow man took a step back. “Not so fast...” His hand raised in warning. “Did you bring what I
requested?” Amidal hesitated. The lump in his pocket, a priceless trinket, now seemed to grow in
weight. Was it truly worth it? To go this far? To take so much? He lit another cigarette as his fingers
dove in to pull out the amulet from the depths of his pouch. It was nothing out of the ordinary. It was
thick with gold and had eccentric, foreign inscriptions and patterns chiselled into the pendent of the
necklace. One could have easily bought a similar piece from a south American jeweller. Why the
shadow man wanted this particular one and why it had been so heavily guarded at the museum was
anyone’s guess, but the money he was to receive.... The money he could use to help his cancer filled
wife.... The retired master thief would give anything to save her. The green would purchase the life
saving treatment, this moment would be pushed aside as an act of good will, and all would be right
with the world. Amidal dragged a long breath of smoke. From the shade, a pearly white smile could be
traced out as the metallic collar shown in the dim street light. On cue, the shadow man opened the
suitcase to reveal stacks of currency, each bill crisp and new, as if printed. Amidal, the retired crook,
gawked at the amount. Never in his wildest dreams had he imagined such riches. Was what he held
really that valuable? Could he bargain for more than 100k? The shadow man must have been a mind
reader; as the very thought crossed the Amidal’s mind, he nudged the suitcase.
“You know, I’m not really a patient fellow, and I have other business to attend to...”
He made up his mind.
“I’ll do it.”
The shadowy figured emerged from the darkness. A sickly thin fellow emerged, but with a toned figure
that seemed to offset his slim stature. His scalp was absent of hair and his features were sharp and
elegant. He was dressed entirely in black. In two long strides, he was before the man. He grabbed the
pendent and replaced its grip with the suitcase. Amidal couldn’t believe his luck. She’d be saved! He
looked up at the grinning shadow man, with a business like gratitude. It was when his eyes were level
with the shadow mans that the blade entered his skull. The shadow man removed his weapon and
picked up the suitcase, wiping his weapon clean along his suit. He kicked the man’s twitching corpse
and snickered as he walked away, not caring to dispatch of the proof of his foul deed.
“Pleasure doing business with you.”
A foot caught the spark and put an end to any possibility that it would catch alight again.
“You got the stuff?” A shadow flickered as another man emerged from the darkness.
“Yeah, I got it.” The shadow man revealed a previously absent suitcase was brought from beneath his
coat. An atmosphere of tension was immediately born at the sight of the suitcase. What it contained
would change everything. It would make everything right again. Amidal took a step forward. The
shadow man took a step back. “Not so fast...” His hand raised in warning. “Did you bring what I
requested?” Amidal hesitated. The lump in his pocket, a priceless trinket, now seemed to grow in
weight. Was it truly worth it? To go this far? To take so much? He lit another cigarette as his fingers
dove in to pull out the amulet from the depths of his pouch. It was nothing out of the ordinary. It was
thick with gold and had eccentric, foreign inscriptions and patterns chiselled into the pendent of the
necklace. One could have easily bought a similar piece from a south American jeweller. Why the
shadow man wanted this particular one and why it had been so heavily guarded at the museum was
anyone’s guess, but the money he was to receive.... The money he could use to help his cancer filled
wife.... The retired master thief would give anything to save her. The green would purchase the life
saving treatment, this moment would be pushed aside as an act of good will, and all would be right
with the world. Amidal dragged a long breath of smoke. From the shade, a pearly white smile could be
traced out as the metallic collar shown in the dim street light. On cue, the shadow man opened the
suitcase to reveal stacks of currency, each bill crisp and new, as if printed. Amidal, the retired crook,
gawked at the amount. Never in his wildest dreams had he imagined such riches. Was what he held
really that valuable? Could he bargain for more than 100k? The shadow man must have been a mind
reader; as the very thought crossed the Amidal’s mind, he nudged the suitcase.
“You know, I’m not really a patient fellow, and I have other business to attend to...”
He made up his mind.
“I’ll do it.”
The shadowy figured emerged from the darkness. A sickly thin fellow emerged, but with a toned figure
that seemed to offset his slim stature. His scalp was absent of hair and his features were sharp and
elegant. He was dressed entirely in black. In two long strides, he was before the man. He grabbed the
pendent and replaced its grip with the suitcase. Amidal couldn’t believe his luck. She’d be saved! He
looked up at the grinning shadow man, with a business like gratitude. It was when his eyes were level
with the shadow mans that the blade entered his skull. The shadow man removed his weapon and
picked up the suitcase, wiping his weapon clean along his suit. He kicked the man’s twitching corpse
and snickered as he walked away, not caring to dispatch of the proof of his foul deed.
“Pleasure doing business with you.”
Kiki- Posts : 307
Join date : 2008-08-10
Age : 31
Location : Canada
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